Way too single

I was telling a friend of mine that I must be WAY too single. You know you've been single too long when you've hit the Girls Gone Wild hour and you're looking at all these dumb ads and you're like "Ya know...2 tapes for $10...that aint a bad deal!" "Hot local girls? All I have to do is call and there's hot women on the other line!?!? Where do I sign up?"

I wonder how these scams even got started. Maybe I'd understand more if I went to Mardi Gras. Anyway, can I hate on a guy who is able to make a respectable *cough* living getting random women to show him their boobs? I say thee nay.