What Women Want -- Mr. Rorschach

Recently, I've found myself engaged in the timeless argument of what women want in a man. Or at least...what they SAY they want. I find these to often be 2, sometimes COMPLETELY, different things.

"Mr. Rorschach"

If you delve into the women's playbook of things they say they want in a man, THE go-to argument that women will give you is that their man of choice does NOT have to be handsome...at all. In fact, he doesnt have to look like much of anything. I've decided to name him, Mr. Rorschach. Mr. Rorschach, the whatever faced dude.



Women, en masse, will have you believe that they either do not care what a guy looks like, or that its absolutely secondary to ANYTHING else. Among all of the extraordinarily counterfeit things a woman will say on this topic, this one is the MOST worthless. I'm talking Monopoly money. Disney dollars look at this statement and laugh their fool heads off.

Looks dont matter? Pfftt... #stopit5

So why do women stick to this absurd statement? Because it sits at the foundation of the belief that men are more shallow than women. Gentlemen, dont be fooled. Women are just as shallow as we are. Period. Looks matter. To EVERYONE. Always have. Always will. A women will lecture you on how much a guy's looks doesnt matter...and follow it up with how tall he needs to be...which apparently is, "a few inches taller than me in whatever heels I choose to wear to make myself look taller." I digress.

How many times do you hear a woman complain about how some dude tried to talk to them in the club/bar/social event using whatever dumb line dumb dudes say? We all know that the REAL complaint is that this dumb dude was not "handsome" to them. Otherwise, she'd probably smile, giggle, and at least give the guy A LITTLE conversation. I mean...unless what he said was so beyond the realm of tasteless that he really should just be slapped, right? Come on, ladies. Admit it.

What about those times when women complain...well, if you want to call it "complaining"...that some guy was trying to talk to her while she was just looking blah and her hair wasnt done and maybe she'd been eating Funyuns or something? You were just wearing a t-shirt and sweats right? But quiet as kept, its that t-shirt that makes the "ladies" look phenomenal and those sweats that say POW! Make Sir Mix-a-Lot wanna come out of retirement. SMH...you women are the best con artists ever!!

                       Lemme holla at cha, mama

BUT (see what I did there) if you feel like wasting your time arguing with women on this particular fallacy, you can bring up how its a BETTER argument that women are actually MORE looks-oriented than men. I mean...we love looking at women. All sorts of women...but we could give a fuck about what the next dude looks like. Thats where we differ from women. Women actually care more about what women look like than men do. Oh you think she's getting her hair and nails done FOR YOU!?!? Nah son. Its because that bish over there think she cute and needs to be shown who is who...and what is what. And if YOU like it...well, you BETTER like it. And you better make it known to her THAT you like it...or there will be CONSEQUENCES AND REPERCUSSIONS!!

Gentlemen, you know the deal. Keep it together. There isnt THAT much to looking worth a damn. But please believe if you dont put ANY effort in, women will pass you up like pennies in the street.